Holy Crap

It has been soooo long since i posted. So much has happened in that like six almost seven months. Well last time i posted i still had a grandpa. My grandpa's health had been going down hill for quite some time, and finally it all caught up with him and he ended up in the hospital with a collapsed right lung and congestive heart failure. They got him stable, and were going to try and keep his heart from going out of rhythm. The medicine that was supposed to be helping his heart made his kidneys fail, and when they tried to fix his kidney's his heart went out of rhythm. It was an on going cycle that they couldnt control. He was having a hard time breathing, and they were looking at installing a ventilator, grandpa said no. He wanted to go. So the last time I saw my grandpa, he was alive and talking, a few hours later, he was gone. It all happened so fast that i didnt have time to even realize what was happening. Before i knew it, i was getting ready to go to the viewing. i wasnt ready for any of this, but when are you? so i went to the viewing and saw the video with all the pictures of my grandpa playing in the lobby of the morgue, the first song was, "Nat King Cole- Unforgettable". That was it. Completely lost it. I went into the viewing room and saw my grandpa laying there, more peaceful than i had seen him since my grandma was alive. It was seriously not okay, i wasnt okay with any of this happening. Im still not completely over it. I bawl when i pass his house everyday. It just doesn't seem real. Well during all of this my sister, Brooke, was having my first niece. I was on this emotional rollercoaster of death. It was really hard to be happy for a new baby, when i just lost my grandpa, and it was really hard to be sad about my grandpa when i was so excited for a new niece! On top of all of that, the day of the funeral, i was going to see my idol, Lady Gaga! i dont know how i made it threw that week. seriously. but i made it, i love my niece more than anything. lady gaga is my favorite person in the whole world. so in between all of this i was still working and going to school. school was rough.. my anatomy class almost killed me. after this week of insanity, i was left with a foggy brain. i could not for the life of me remember lectures or anything for that matter. it still hasnt fully come back either :/  but i made it. i had a little break and now im back at it. im taking a summer math class that i absolutely hate. it is the worst thing that i have ever done. it is at 7 AM, and i have been working at the theater almost everday. All-in-all, i am completely pooped, and stressed. I cant wait for July 1st because thats when i take my final, and i can be DONE! On June 24th, im going to Kid Cudi! I cant wait. I love me some Cudi, and Vegas! It should be a nice little get away. I almost forgot, cleaning out my grandpa's house, i got a lot of treasures. one of my favorites is my grandmas record player and all of her records. Records are my new favorite thing. LOVE them. Well i think that i should stop. I need to learn to keep up so i dont have to write as much. Ill do my best, but thats what i always say. Ha.